These employees are paid at the most $50 a week, most of the time I was there I was making $20 or less.
|This is the Advanced Organization of Los Angeles (AOLA for short). This is where I worked|
|This is the AOLA Atrium. I had to sit in front of the committee that |
investigated, humiliated and kicked me out of the Sea Org for being
gay right behind this room. If you look straight ahead to the wood panel
area, it was right back there
|This is where I was in Clearwater|
If you want to imagine what it is like to work in the Sea Org think of it this way. Imagine all the complaints you have about your workplace. Imagine if you could never speak about any of them, under threat of being interrogated while connected to a lie detector. Imagine spending every day being yelled at by your boss. Not just normal frustration, you're talking pure, unadulterated anger. Fury even. This coupled with personal insults about your honesty and integrity. On top of that there is no way to change jobs and threatening to leave will only make things worse.
Everyone is treated as though they are a single, unimportant cog in a huge organization. You are never made to feel appreciated as an individual, you are treated the same as the rest of the group no matter how much work you put in. Information is highly compartmentalized, even to the point that it might hinder your ability to do your work.
|This is one of the heaviest forms of indoctrination|
that Scientology has. It teaches you not to trust
the outside world.
On top of that your Scientology programming teaches you that if you think something is wrong, then something must be wrong with you. I had been indoctrinated in Scientology since childhood and this was reinforcing it even more.
When I was in Clearwater, FL I was bunking with some fellow Sea Org members from the UK. One of my bunk mates and I ended up forming a relationship that must have lasted a couple of months or so. I don't really remember, it's such a blur. This was the first time that I ever felt love for a fellow human being on that level and I never have since. That is a big no-no in the Sea Org and really in Scientology as a whole.
Scientology is completely, 100% anti-gay. They view anyone who is gay as disgusting and evil. They believe that anyone who is gay, or anyone who doesn't fit Hubbard's idea of a "normal" human should be done away with quietly and without sorrow. They are really like a quiet version of the Westboro Baptists.
|This is the type of machine I was shredding paper|
in. It was enclosed in a small room full of dust.
I did not have a mask and my snot would come out
all kinds of different colors.
I had to work in book stocks putting books in cardboard boxes to be shipped out. After that I had to work filing moldy papers away. Both of these were in basement tunnels underneath L. Ron Hubbard way because I was expected to avoid any contact with other Sea Org members. Like I was some kind of contagion that could pass on my disease to people. The last thing I had to do was work in the carport shredding documents. Tens of thousands of documents on an industrial shredder. My snot would come out all different colors because of all the paper I was shredding.
|This is what goes on behind closed doors in Scientology. Except without the "God hates" because Scientology doesn't believe in God. They consider anyone who is against Scientology or who doesn't fit the Hubbard-defined "normal" as evil.|
|This is what my confessionals looked like. Except imagine tears and shame instead of a smile. A 16 year old kid in the chair holding the cans. And imagine that 16 year old kid talking to a grown man about his sexual proclivities.|
Now that I had finally been released from the hell of the Sea Org I had to face my parents.